


D R E A M I N G

by Greybin (TyunnieBFF)



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Best Friends, Character Death, Dreams, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Heavy Angst, M/M, Read at Your Own Risk, The Author Regrets Nothing, Tragedy, Unsaid Confessions, beomkai angst for the soul, cuz one of em dies, good fluff, haha - Freeform, its always THAT one, its beomkai what else do you expect, lol, prepare tissues, taejun are just cameo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 20:26:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30077853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TyunnieBFF/pseuds/Greybin
Summary: “Row, row, row your boatGently down the streamMerrily merrily, merrily, merrilyLife is but a dream”“Why are you singing that stupid song?” Beomgyu snorts out a laugh at his companion, his head shaking with amusement at the younger boy who only sheepishly laughs at him.
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Huening Kai
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	D R E A M I N G

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

“Why are you singing that stupid song?” Beomgyu snorts out a laugh at his companion, his head shaking with amusement at the younger boy who only sheepishly laughs at him. 

The 11-year-old boy teases his friend, watching for the other’s cute reactions.

Hueningkai shrugs his shoulders, hands still around the chain of the swing as his legs kick off the ground lightly, pushing him into the air with his slightly overgrown hair flowing in the wind.

“What? It's a nice tune” the boy retorts with a pout, his eyes playfully glaring at his best friend, the two are in the playground on a warm afternoon after yet another day of school. 

It's their little escape from the bustling speedy way the world moves, even for kids like them, the world moves just too fast, time will just sprint by and before they know it, they’re going to take another leap in life. 

Time, humans can never have enough time.

They say there is no absolute value for something as precious as time, and yet time is what most would waste continuously every day.

But how is something that is infinite can be something valuable? 

There is no end to time, we can never run out of time like how we may run out of gold or fossil fuels. 

But if one were to be asked which holds more value, the answer would be time. 

“For a 5-year-old sure” The older boy teases him, Hueningkai sighs and smiles at him, he could never be mad at the older boy. But Hueningkai is rarely ever mad at anyone, the little boy looks up to the sky as he swings.

Curious eyes staring up to the wide-open sky that is slowly splashed with hues of yellow and orange of dawn “I just think…...the song is quite sad isn’t it?” he suddenly comments, humming the tune along under his breath.

He remembered the exact time when he was four and his father taught him the tune, young and small on a little boat down the streams of the little town in some random fisherman village in the outskirts of China mainland before they moved to Korea.

It’s his favorite song, and the only song he would sing at kindergarten. 

“What?” Beomgyu quirked an eyebrow at Kai, confused by what he meant. He’s heard the song too many times while growing up but never would’ve associated such an innocent song with sadness.

In fact, from what he remembered the song was supposed to be about being positive and keep moving forward. 

And yet Kai sits there in the swing seat, the 10-year-old’s orbs shimmering with a glint that speaks a lot about the boy’s maturity, an aftermath of a terrible fate.

“Listen hyung….” he softly tells him and begins to sing the five-stanza song that any child would know and recognize. 

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

Beomgyu frowns, playing the tune once more in his head “What’s so sad about that?”

Hueningkai lets his swing come to a halt, the wonder in his gaze shines through as he turns to face Beomgyu “Do you think our life is just a dream hyung? And one day…...we’ll wake up...?”

Beomgyu too freezes in his actions, his own swing pausing to take in those words, the meaning it held. A frown of concern crawling up to his face, the wind around them continues to blow, picking up strength as the dawn ascends. 

And while he understands why someone like Kai, who lost family to something as permanent as death would have circling thoughts of such things. 

He never could tell just how deep those fragments of thoughts had pierced through his mind, what kind of horrid scare it left on someone so young.

Time has no end, but human’s life does.

But these two share a similarity, just like time, one can’t bring back the dead just as how time can’t be rewinded. 

“Living, this world, it’s so huge. Maybe it is just one big dream…” The younger boy continues to trail off, closing his eyes as memories of his childhood floods him.

Pieces of his life that he remembered, bringing him a sense of warmth and gloom at the same time. Holding his sister’s warm hand as they run up the streets to school, his mother’s lips on his forehead each time before he closes his eyes and drifts to sleep and away to dreamland. 

Or it could be him who is dreaming right now, and this whole reality that he lives in is just a temporary simulation of his own mind. 

Because that’s what life is isn’t it? 

Temporary, and while death, on the other hand, is permanent.

“And what do we even wake up to?” Beomgyu supplies, being Kai’s first friend when he first came to Korea, is easily one of the boy’s most trusted friends.

He learns early on in their current 3-year long friendship about the reason Hueningkai moved to Korea in the first place. His family ran into a major car accident in China while commuting to his piano recital at school, his mother and sisters did not survive the tragedy,

And to find a new beginning, his father, now his only family member left, had them move to Korea to hopefully heal from the scar the tragedy left in their now too small family of two. 

Hueningkai laughs lightly at his hyung, a sound that bleeds with pain yet has traces of healing.

“Who knows” he replies, thoughts already trailing over the possibilities of what lies after they’re awakened from this dream. 

Beomgyu jumps off the swings and stands in front of him, the older boy’s warm deep chocolate eyes gazing down at the smaller boy with utmost adoration. Their friendship isn’t long yet he grew so fond of the mixed boy, drawn to him in such a way he can’t look away.

“Then let's just keep dreaming Huening-ah, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there”

“Just keep rowing?” Hueningkai asks with a smile, his lips curving up shyly with their gaze locked. 

Beomgyu pats his hair with a laugh, the boy then takes his arms to pull him up from the swing seat “Whatever floats your boat Huening-ah” the sky is getting dark as the sun begins to bid farewell. 

The two boys walk together down the not so busy street of their port city of Sokcho, passing by stalls and adults briskly walking around as they head home “Remember what Mrs. Kim told us to write about for our essay?”

Beomgyu tilts up his head to recall said task, eyes glowing with recognition when he finally remembers it “Oh our ambition? Yeah! I want to be a racecar driver, or maybe a lawyer but an adventurer sounds cool too…” the black-haired boy drones on about the multiple choices of career he has in mind.

The awed look on Hueningkai’s face at his rambles goes unnoticed, the boy frowns but shakes it off as quick as it came “Wow…. you…. you seem to know to want to do”

“Don’t you?”

Kai timidly shakes his head, a hand rubbing his nape as he admits “Not really…...”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about it…. you got a long life ahead of you to find out!” Beomgyu cheers him on, the male even swings an arm over Kai’s shoulders, winking at him as he throws Kai a thumbs up.

Hueningkai can’t help but chuckle at the elder’s antics, Beomgyu is just so bright and full of life, something that Kai once was but it died along with his late family in China. 

Seeing Beomgyu, having this burst of energy around never fails to raise his mood and put a smile on his face.

Beomgyu should always shine like this, Hueningkai is so sure, with how vibrant his hyung is, nothing in life could ever dimmer it.

Beomgyu will always shine like he is his own star, and Hueningkai will always be facing him like an admiring sunflower, basking in that light for as long as he’s allowed to. 

“Hmmm I guess you’re right…...sing with me hyung?” he watches as Beomgyu’s face scrunches up with obvious exaggeration at the request, a funny sight that makes him giggle with glee. 

“What? No!” The male refuses but Hueningkai knows his ways to get the elder to do what he wants.

The smaller of the two hugs his best friend, a hand on the other’s belly rubbing circles “C’mon, please?” he pleads in a high pitch voice and flashes his famous puppy eyes.

Beomgyu gave in to his friend then and there, never the one to be able to resist those cute orbs looking at him like that. 

“Ugh, fine” Kai cheers with both fists shooting up in the air. The two continue to walk down the streets, singing to the repetitive tune as they go, their hands interlocked together swinging as they march home. 

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

Beomgyu blinks his eyes open, the darkness of the tent greets his sight as he rubs his eyes groggily. He shifts his position in the sleeping bed, the sound of rustling sheets echoes the quiet tent, that is until another faint sound catches his attention.

A humming, coming from a sleeping bag away from his own, he sees a mess of brown with his face facing away from him with his back turned “Hmm…. K-Kai?” he utters with a yawn. 

The boy in question suddenly stops humming, Hueningkai turns around to face his hyung with his eyes wide with surprise “Oh hyung? Why are you still awake?” his own whisper echoes the tent.

Thankfully the third camper, the kid sleeping in the middle, is a deep sleeper.

They’re both on their middle school class camping trip of sorts in Jeju, three days long away from home. But Beomgyu does notice Kai having trouble getting sleep, he isn’t too used to being far away from his father.

“Why are YOU still awake?” the older asks, lying in his sleeping bag while facing the ceiling above them, he hears Kai chuckle “I can’t sleep”

“Oh, want to talk about it?” Hueningkai’s breath hitches at the suggestion, the boy sighs as the usual frown takes its place.

“You already know hyung…...and no I don’t want to…” he feels skittish enough as it is, his father had encouraged him to go on the trip and Hueningkai doesn’t want to worry him by calling every hour but he’s plunged with anxiety. 

What if his father is gone by the time he returns like his mom and sisters—

Beomgyu could practically hear the younger boy’s distress from across their small tent, he suddenly thought of an idea that might just help “I have an idea that might cheer you up, come on!”

Hueningkai sits up in his sleeping bag at the sound of shuffling and rusting of fabric, he grabs his phone and flashes at Beomgyu “W-what?” the older boy is tucking his shirt into his shorts and putting on his shoes and jacket. 

“Don’t just look at me, get dressed!” Kai gulps and puts his phone aside, following Beomgyu’s ministrations he too grabs his jacket and shoes. Beomgyu leads them out of the tent, ushering Kai to be quiet as they take the familiar path of the little campsite down to a stream with flashlights in hand.

“We’re gonna get in big trouble?!” the younger boy yelps when they arrive, standing on the small platform with a few rowboats tied to the supporting beam. 

Hueningkai turns on his flashlight for Beomgyu who carefully unties one of the boats, stepping into it. “We will if you keep shouting, pipe down and get in” he carefully sits down in the stern seat of the boat at the rear end, beckoning Hueningkai to hop in. 

The skies above are still dark since it's 2am in the morning, Hueningkai takes in a deep shaky breath and cautiously lowers himself into the wooden rowboat, it wobbles slightly with his weight but Kai is quick to hoist himself back up immediately. 

“Hyung this is crazy” he chants out breathlessly, he sits sprawled on the wooden platform with bated breath. 

His heart drums with fear from the thrill while Beomgyu only laughs “What is life if it's not crazy? Now stop being a wuss and climb on” this time the elder getting up to guide Kai in himself, he’s glad that he learned to handle the boats quite easily during the lessons they had in the previous day.

“Are you sure you-” But Beomgyu already has his hands around the other’s, tugging Kai forward gently to get on the boat. The younger boy a few inches shorter than him stumbles in and clings onto his elder friend.

His arms around Beomgyu tightly with their bodies pressed together, he could feel the elder’s thumping heartbeat against his ears while the elder boy snickers at him with a tease. 

Running his hands through Kai’s soft brown hair, he smiles and helps him sit down “Oh shut up Hueningkai and just enjoy it alright? Life is too short to be a worrywart” he grabs one of the oars and pushes the boat away from the platform.

The rowboat drifts away and once it's out and away from the other boats, Beomgyu dips the oar into the water and keeps them moving down the stream, he’s already gone down the path with his group so he knows Kai will like it.

Hueningkai has been sitting silently, eyes glancing around gleaming with awe as he flashes his flashlight around. The beautiful greenery and calming sound of water flowing make up a serene atmosphere in the quietness of the early morning.

“Fine…...this is…. nice” He admittedly mumbles with a small curve on his lips, the boy carefully dips his hand in the water, feeling the coldness tickle the tips of his fingers. His mind relaxes as his worries are forgotten, putting a satisfied smirk on Beomgyu’s face. 

Hueningkai looks pretty in the view, his jacket hugging his frame with his fluffy long brown hair messy from restless twisting and turning on the bed. Beomgyu can’t help but stare at how his mouth hangs slightly agape, looking around the beautiful scenery innocently.

“It's so pretty…...hyung there are fireflies!” he exclaims and points out, finger high in the air as blinking yellow lights appear around them. Kai’s smile brightens at once, turning back and forth to look at the glowing insects.

Beomgyu warmly chuckles at him, glad that the boy is happy and smiling again. The creases of his anxiety from before no longer visible on his face “Told ya you’ll like it here” he tells him.

Hueningkai pouts with pink tints of blush on his cheeks, but he nods at his hyung’s words, admitting the truth in them. The two boys continue to waft down the stream with Beomgyu occasionally rowing the boat.

The elder boy pauses on his actions when Kai begins to sing that childish song again, lips softly singing each syllable, gently as the boat drifts down the stream. This time he doesn’t say a word and simply enjoys the sweet singing.

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

Beomgyu yawns, his hair messily blown by the sea breeze. “Kai isn’t it too early…...It's like 7am?” The boy next to him giggles at his whining, Kai did drag him out of bed early on purpose. The two of them are on the deck of the cruise ship, looking out into the sea, the sun is still hovering above the horizon, rising slowly.

Hueningkai’s dad won a special prize through his company event, a cruise trip for three. Not wanting to waste the third spot, Kai had asked if Beomgyu could join them and he did. The two boys hold hands while standing on the deck. 

“I think I know what I want to be when I grow up now” Kai suddenly says, a warm gaze fixated. 

Beomgyu nods along, head resting on the other’s shoulder, he is 18 and Kai is 17 now, the boy managed to outgrow and tower him over time. The little boy he played with at the playground grew up tall and handsome, but he still is that same kind of precious boy from all those years ago.

“Oh, really what is it?” he asks, mind still drowsy from sleep.

Hueningkai lowers his gaze to the water below, eyes sparkling with curiosity “I want to explore the life down there” he points his finger down to the crashing waves.

Beomgyu raises an eyebrow at him “In the sea?” He does remember Kai looking up institutions that specialize in marine research. He shouldn’t be so surprised; Kai has always shown interest in marine life. 

The boy has a fairly large aquarium at home, his old hometown back in china was a port that his dad would often take him and his sisters out to sail down the smaller streams. He loves water sports and activities, and he could name and tell different types of penguins apart because it's his favorite animal.

“Yep, I want to know what kind of creatures are there down there, the sea always feels like a big world that we have yet to discover so much about. I’m thinking of applying for this research program…...maybe I’ll get in” Kai continues to tell him, and Beomgyu wants more than anything to support him.

But he’s not all that willing to part with Kai, if the boy does go for marine studies then Beomgyu wouldn’t be able to see him as often because Kai will be out at sea, far away, and out of reach.

He has thought of pursuing his dreams of becoming a racer but Beomgyu doesn’t see a future where can be happy without Kai by his side.

“That’s cool but can you take me with you when you go?” he mumbles under his breath, just audible enough for the other to hear him. Kai widens his eyes at the request “But hyung, you said you wanted-”

Beomgyu cuts him off curtly, a small smile on his lips that’s laced with a tinge of bittersweetness “If you go, you’ll be so far away from me. And I don’t want that” he clarifies for the other, Kai feels his cheeks warming up at the confession.

He shyly laughs, heart drumming so hard he almost couldn’t form words “Hyung you’re silly, I’m not going forever, I’ll come back of course!” It’s only a couple months long, he could come back and tell all the things he’d learn and discover to his hyung.

But Beomgyu shakes his head, mind made up already and there’s nothing Kai could do about it “Nope nope!! You have to take me with you, besides, how come you get to go on fun adventures and discover new things and I don’t?” he retaliates back with a tease.

Of course, that’s not entirely why he’d want to go. He wants to be with Kai, close as can be, never far apart. If fate wants to place an ocean between them, Beomgyu will just simply flip a middle finger at it and follow after Kai like a shadow he’s always been.

“Fine, on one condition” The older of the two looks up curiously, although he has a very vague idea of the condition he’s about to hear. Nevertheless, Beomgyu still asks “What?”

Kai’s eyes gleam with that very same innocence, the one that remains constant even after all these years “Sing the song with me?” he requests, and yes Beomgyu knows and can tell that was coming.

He’s been singing that same children's song for ages, while it is endearing, Beomgyu wonders how he is not tired of it yet.

A heavy fake sigh escapes his lips, “Aish that kid song again? You’re still singing it?” he’s heard enough of it to haunt him in his sleep, but with Kai looking at him pleadingly paired with the hope in his orbs, how can Beomgyu say no?

“C’mon hyung please?” he asks once more, arms linking around Beomgyu’s. The male nearly chokes on air, quickly ignoring the rush of his heart so it doesn’t show on his face “Geez, you’re lucky I love you”

Kai leans in to hug him, his face red with blush even if he understands that those words held nothing more than platonic meaning, “Love you too hyung” if only he knew it expends just a little beyond that mark.

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

“Do you think if I push Yeonjun shii off the ship I’ll get in trouble?” Beomgyu comments with a puff of breath, Hueningkai snickers at him although half concerned if the male is really serious about it. 

The 19-year-old boy shakes his head at his recently turned 20 hyung, both of them climbing down the hatch to the big water vehicle that’ll soon sink down the ocean. The research program will be conducted underwater in a submarine lab, they will travel the sea for 5 months, after applying and going through all the needed tests and training sessions, both males are finally going on the submarine. 

“He’s our mentor?” Kai reasons, sitting on his bunk of the two-person cabin. Beomgyu snorts, chugging down a bottle of water “He’s a pain in the ass” but nearly drops said bottle when a third person suddenly opens the cabin door.

“Beomgyu shii, Kai shii, Yeonjun shii is looking for you two” Kang Taehyun, a blonde senior researcher of the program informs them, the two nod and make their way to the mentor’s lab in the fairly big submarine lab.

Beomgyu grumbles a “What now….” under his breath, each new applicant is paired and placed under a senior researcher’s guidance for the program, thankfully for the two of them, they end up together but probably with the toughest and strict guy on board.

Yeonjun doesn’t even look up from his papers, forehead creasing with obvious stress while he glares down the papers in his hand “I need you two to go to the lower east tanks engine, there’s seems to be a bit of a minor bug so it is not working properly” he commands them to which they both nod and be on their way.

Interestingly other than studying the sea creatures and marine life, Yeonjun also made them learn the functions of the watercraft. They’re no expert but minor bugs and re-calibrating needs are simple enough for them to fix. 

“Well okay then” Beomgyu stands in front of the control panel, multiple huge water tanks stacked in rows around them. He does a quick scan of the system report on the screen, groaning when he knows what they have to do.

“It's the jam in the pyro thingy in tank 3” he mutters to Kai, lips thinning knowing one of them has to suit up and dive into the tank to fix it. Kai hums in response, hand already behind his head in position. 

Beomgyu smirks “Rock paper scissors, who loses has to go in!” he chants and pulls up his own hand, it's childish but effective, and it's not like there’s anyone else down there with them, only a couple more crew staff who are going around checking things.

“Rock paper scissors!” Beomgyu throws scissors and Kai throws a rock, Kai wins.

The elder of the two groans “Ugh Kai!!” he whines out loud to which Kai only laughs at “You always throw scissors first” it has been the sole reason why he can continuously play and win against Beomgyu in the game.

Beomgyu runs a finger through his dark hair “Dammit I’m gonna get my hair ruined again” he isn’t serious of course; he would do it but Kai suddenly speaks up. 

“You know if you don’t want to, I can go” he offers, it's much more productive than sitting around waiting anyway. Beomgyu’s eyes light up at his words “You sure? Thanks, Huening-ah!” he chirps, Kai finds himself cooing silently at the cuteness of it.

Kai takes off the dark blue hoodie he’s wearing, leaving him in a black short-sleeved shirt and the shorts he’s had on. He grabs one set of specialized diving equipment, equipping it on himself. 

There’s a mouth mask-like cover that goes over the bottom half of his head, a thin tube connecting it to the oxygen cylinders strapped to his back like a backpack. There’s a communicator device implanted at the ear part and a mic as well that he’ll use to talk to Beomgyu while in the water tank.

The cylinders will give him 50 minutes of oxygen at most, so Kai has to move quickly, after letting Beomgyu check him over, the male grabs the underwater tool kit and climbs up the stairs, he dives gracefully down into the tank. 

Swimming to the bottom, Kai opens a hatch and begins to work his way through the jammed situation with Beomgyu chanting the instructions as a reminder through the communicator device. He’s done this a couple of times for training, so it’s not that big of a deal.

But Kai is relatively slower than Beomgyu at this, so he takes a bit more time to get everything fixed, the male softly humming a familiar tune to himself as he works his way through the issue calmly. 

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_Life is but a dream”_

“You good there?” Beomgyu’s voice booms through the earpiece, Kai chuckles “Yeah give me a minute” he’s almost done, Kai finishes it up and is about to close the hatch when everything around them suddenly jolts harshly with force.

“Woah! What the fuck?!” Beomgyu grabs onto the nearest rail, the crash booming through the entire submarine. His eyes peel open wide with shock at the sound of screeching metal, the metal plates above had bent in and toppled over some of the support beams.

“Hyung?! Hyung what’s going on?!?!” Kai’s fearful voice rings through his own earpiece, the elder of the two still in shock but a sudden flash of red lights snaps him out of it.

_“Red alert! Red Alert! The ship has struck an unidentified obstacle, all crew and occupants please proceed to the Emergency Safety escape pods”_ the sound system calls out with urgency, the once calm space now flashing red and white, beckoning for every person on the watercraft to evacuate.

“Fuck, Huening Kamal Kai get out of there-” To his horror, one of it had crashed right above tank three, the top part of the tank now covered with heavy pieces of fallen metal, Kai is hovering in the water right below his closed exit, his only way out.

“No…..no no no” Beomgyu jumps to his feet and scrambles up the stairs, jumping over the fallen over equipment and pieces of fallen metal, pushing himself through each feeble obstacle till he reaches the top of the tank. 

Frantically he tries to push the pieces of hard solid off but there’s only so much his strength could do against hard metal that pretty much smashed itself onto the tank. The dread in the pit of his stomach lurching like waves, growing ten folds wilder with each passing minute because Kai doesn’t have much time.

The oxygen won’t last long and he already spent most of it just now, Beomgyu doesn't even realize that he is screaming, no words or sentences, just loud bursts of screams and shouts with his tears falling. He’s terrified, his Kai is still in the goddamn tank. 

“Hyung...I….ca-can't….it won’t ….. open” when Kai’s straining voice registers in his ears, and something snaps. Beomgyu knows he’s not going to be able to move the contraption, it basically sealed the tank shut. 

There has to be another way, there _has_ to be “Dammit dammit dammit!!” The curses spill out from his lips as he rushes back down, Kai swims down near him, the Perspex glass standing in between them. 

Beomgyu can see his horrified face, how his eyes although in water screams with fear, and while it's not noticeable, Beomgyu knows he’s crying. “Hyung...I can’t...I can’t get out” he mumbles a whisper, the unsaid words echoing loudly in Beomgyu’s head.

_I’m going to drown, I’m going to die_

He is sure that he’s going dizzy with panic but he manages to catch a few crewmates dashing through the area, making their way to the escape pods. “Hold on-HEY!! HEY HELP! HE’S TRAPPED!!” he shouts with all his might but only one of them turns their head to look.

The guy takes one look at the situation and frowns “Who cares?! The water is already leaking in if you don't escape now, you’ll die!!” the other shouts at him and from fear suddenly births a wave of livid anger. 

“What the fuck-FUCK YOU?!?!” He curses out loud, not caring anymore if it's any of his superiors. His voice and loud and thundering but no one cares, “FUCK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU?!!?” but a sudden quake in the watercraft causes him to almost fall. 

He grabs onto the broken control panel, “Hyung watch- '' But Kai warned him a split second too late, some random pipe got loose and crashed down, sending more parts of the submarines into domino falls. 

“Hyung…” Kai calls him, a defeated look in his gaze. Beomgyu shakes his head, he’s not going to give up, he can’t give up on Kai, not even if the male gave up on himself. Beomgyu can’t lose him, he won’t accept it. 

“Dammit, Kai...I... hold on let me…” he looks around, scrambling around the control panel, pressing anything he could to match the hatch move but nothing is working, the electricity cackles and buzz. But nothing is helping him free Kai from the tank. 

Kai bites down on his lips, his cold trembling fists rest on the glass, “Go, look…. the water...it's rising” he watches as more and more seawater pours into the base, now it's up to Beomgyu’s thigh level and making it hard to move around.

“No, I’m not leaving without you!” The older male shouts, bewildered that Kai would even suggest him to do such a thing. His sanity at its limit, driven with panic and worry and most of all the horror of losing Kai.

Then, the younger’s sobs booms from his earpiece, it was soft, quiet, and almost inaudible. But it rings so loudly in his ears, it’s the worst sound Beomgyu has ever heard coming from the male “You’ll die…... please…. you can still be saved…. n–not me”

Beomgyu clenches his teeth, “Shut the fuck up Huening Kai, I am not losing you”

Kai presses himself onto the glass, his disheartened face accepting his fate looking at Beomgyu with pleading “H-hyung….” he calls him, but Beomgyu refuses to listen.

He refuses to accept the reality of things, “No you hold on, I’ll…. I’ll think of something!!” he marches through the rising waters, dipping his hand in to find anything, a piece of metal or anything that could break the tank water walls.

“Beomgyu hyung….” 

Beomgyu feels himself stumble, but doesn’t falter in his search. Yet no matter how much he tries, he can’t find anything, “Just…. wait…. there has to…. there has to be a way” the male hisses when he trips over something in the water, groaning as the pain shoots up his ankle.

“BEOMGYU HYUNG!!”

At Kai’s shout, Beomgyu stops. While still on his knees, he turns around to face Kai, his best friend straining a smile for him through his breathing mask that is going to run out of oxygen soon, “…...it's no use…. I’m…. running out of air….” Kai tells him.

Beomgyu wobbly picks himself up, the water-soaked his clothes and heavies him down, on top of that he sprained his ankle. But he still makes his way over to the water tank where Kai is hovering on the other side of the glass. 

“No...no I…. I can’t…. you can’t” he chokes out with a sob, his own tears dribbling down uncontrollably as he touches the tank, two hands on each other separated by thick glass. 

“Hyungie….” Kai starts, his fate is unavoidable. The male is terrified, but Beomgyu is here, and Beomgyu always makes everything feel bearable, he can do this.

As long as Beomgyu is here, he doesn’t have to be afraid, not even of death.

“Hyungie p-please…” he tries to not breathe in much, holding his breath and taking only short breaths, he wants to stay by his hyung’s side, for as long as he can.

Beomgyu is sobbing, his whimpers are incredibly painful to hear, Kai has never seen his ray of light so torn and helpless, he hates it “Y…. yes Kai?” he wants the other to be happy, to always only be happy, Beomgyu should only shine with brightness,

“Stay with me…. just for a bit?” Kai requests, resting his body against the glass, thinking if he presses himself hard enough, he can feel the warmth of being close to Beomgyu instead of the coldness of water around him.

“Of...of course Hueningie…. I’m...I’m here, I’ll always be here”

If only fate allowed that if only time had allowed that. But no, it’s all nothing but a lie, a lie to comfort each other because the truth is horrid.

“Hyung...if…. if we’re all really dreaming…...I think…...I’m…. w–waking up soon” he sobs, Kai still wears his smile, but it’s not the one Beomgyu wants to see. It’s not happy, it’s dreadful, it's a smile that says farewell.

“No...no please...don’t say that…...please” even Beomgyu’s own resistance is crumbling, he presses his forehead onto the glass, he can't do anything anymore than to mumble silent prayers of begging.

A miracle perhaps, to help him, help them.

But this isn’t a fairytale, its life, it may be a dream but it’s not a pretty one.

Kai sags to the side, resting his head on the glass, he has 2 more minutes at most, but he doesn’t want to count down. He doesn’t want to know when it ends, “C–can you...sing hyung?”

Beomgyu, startled by the sudden request bites back another sob, “Wh–what?” he doesn’t want to, he doesn’t want to say goodbye. He doesn’t want to lose him.

Isn’t that why he came along? That’s why he pursued this dream instead of his own? Because he rather loses himself than lose Huening Kai, he rather loses it all than lose Kai to time, distance, or fate.

Should he at least tell Kai how he feels? Or let him go forever not knowing how loved he is by Beomgyu? He couldn't bring himself to talk, “One l–last time…. please.... l–love it...when.... y–you.... sing” Kai’s voice, now wavers with breathlessness.

Beomgyu takes a deep sharp breath, he has to do this, for Kai. If It’s Kai’s…. last wish then he'll do it, he has to “O–oh okay, um you like this song right?” he tries to snicker but can’t.

Beomgyu faces the other male, still floating in the tank, his eyes shaky as they stare into Beomgyu’s own. And with that Beomgyu sings that simple few note melody that Kai loves so much, that he sang throughout their time growing up.

“Row…... row…. row…. your…... boat…... gently down…... the stream…. merrily merrily— _No,_ **no wait** holds on please... please I haven’t finished yet!! KAI!! KAI!!!” 

Beomgyu saw it, he saw the exact moment the oxygen supply cuts off, the exact moment Kai’s mouth hangs open, gasping for air. His hand crawling up to his neck holding it as the burn seizes him. It hurts, it hurts so badly he wants it to stop at once.

But he has to say one last goodbye to Beomgyu, his light, his radiant who he won’t be seeing for a long time, or at least he hopes so. Kai forces up one final smile, the edge of his lips curving at the boy who is slamming his fist onto the glass, shouting his name but Kai can’t hear him, not anymore.

“K–keep…. dreaming…. B–Beom…...hyung” he mutters the last of his thoughts that he could still conjure up before the seething sting overcomes his senses till he feels nothing.

Beomgyu saw with his own two eyes, at the scene only a glass wall away from him, the exact moment Kai gives up and succumbs to death.

Those gentle eyes fall shut in the water, and his body floats stiffly in the tank, unmoving.

“HUENING KAI!!! HUENING KAI!!! NO!!! PLEASE!!!”

Beomgyu shouts, he shouts like he’s never had before, calling Kai’s name and fussing over the device on his ear. His tears do not cease while his throat burns but none of it competes with the anguish in his heart. 

A candle blew out by the cold unforgiving wind.

“What are you doing?! Get up!! C'mon, there’s one more escape pod left!” He hears a voice, through his hysteric breakdown, pairs of arms trying to yank him away but he fights against them, he can't leave Kai, he can’t.

“No!! NO! WAIT I CAN’T LEAVE HIM!!” he screams, but with what energy he’s left he couldn't do much against the strength of the two people dragging him away from the tank, away from Kai.

“Beomgyu shii he’s gone let's go” That was Taehyun, he somehow recognizes, but he doesn't fucking care if it's the president of South Korea that’s dragging him away. The male thrashes and kicks, his screams echoing the submarine walls till he’s shoved into a door.

The door hatch slams shut and Beomgyu scrambles to his feet, the pain in his ankle be damned, he doesn’t want this. He can’t leave Kai, “NO!! KAI!! KAI!!” His shouts fill the pod and only grow more frantic as the pod detaches from the main ship.

Beomgyu keeps slamming on the window. The other two in the escape pod are not moving to stop him, because they know what happens next will do it instead.

In front of his own eyes, Beomgyu watches as the floating vehicle blows up into bits in the water, pieces of it floating away and scatter now creating a mass of floating debris in the water. 

The male drops to the floor as the many pieces of the sub that his best friend was still on strays further and further away from view, curling himself up with broken sobs bubbling from his lips. There’s a sick feeling in his stomach that is almost unbearable, he wails loud and long, full of grief.

Yeonjun lowers his gaze and sighs “I’m sorry Beomgyu shii….” he utters but it didn’t matter, nothing else did anymore.

If this life truly is a dream, then Beomgyu wishes he wakes up soon as well.

_“Row, row, row your boat_

_Gently down the stream_

_Merrily merrily, merrily, merrily_

_You’ve woken from this dream”_

**Author's Note:**

> Had fun crying? Hope you enjoyed that~~  
> -Via
> 
> Follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/TyunnieBFF) if you want!
> 
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